Why you can’t tap into your motivation…

Did you ever say to yourself, “I know what I need to do, I just am not doing it?” As a result, that book isn’t written, that vacation isn’t taken, that report isn’t done on time and the scale shows a number that depresses you.

The Cause of lack of Motivation…No Purpose.

The Key to tapping into Massive Motivation comes from taking your purpose in life and linking it to every action that you take during the day. The process to create those links are as follows.

1. Associate and recall your Purpose. Remember, a purposeful person works in every moment to build and create an emotional expression of themselves internally and externally that will influence and inspire others to do the same. Ask yourself every moment of the day, “Is this action right now purposeful in building and creating the person I want to become and the life I want to have?”

2. Associate into the Emotional ‘Why’ of your Purpose. After Purpose is engaged, a person MUST work to integrate the emotional component, or fully associate into it, what they are working to build and create. If your Purpose is to build and create an incredible level of physical health, associating into what you will feel as a result; the energy, vibrancy, power, strength and confidence if essential. Where purpose and emotion are joined together, a tremendous force and energy is created.

3. This tremendous force then needs an outlet. It needs to be consciously directed into an action that is congruent in moving a person forward in what they are building and creating. It really doesn’t matter how big or small the action is. What matters is that it is congruent in the short and long term, in moving the person one step closer to the successful completion of their purpose. At this point, taking action is very easy. Motivation has kicked in full force.

4. Appreciate the results no matter how BIG or small. Most people fall short of their goals because they don’t remember that cause and effect are instantaneous. All they see is the gap between the small step and the HUGE lottery win they want to have. So, they give up in frustration and think nothing has happened. You never see the change in a person eating one extra pat of butter a day in their diet. However, at the end of the year, they would be 2 pounds heavier. Everything, big or small ads up! A person must trust and have faith in their purposeful actions generating results.

So, if you are wondering, “how can I get more motivated? How can I be more fulfilled and happy in my life? How can I be self directed and self driven?” Here is the magic question. Ask it frequent and often!

“Is this action right now purposeful in building and creating the person I want to become and the life I want to have?”

If the answer is yes, it passed the test. Take the action and the next and the next.

If that answer is no, let it go! Refocus and ask a new question, “What can I do right now to continue to build and create the person I want to become and the life I want to have? What is purposeful for me right now to accomplish in my work? What is purposeful right now for me in terms of health, my relationships?” Remember to associate into the ‘WHY’ you want to build and create…for energy, love, confidence, etc. and celebrate your results.

You will find yourself saying, “I know what I need to do and I’m motivated to do it!”

To your continued success,

James

PS-Looking for define your purpose? Check out www.30DaysforSuccess.com It’s all in there waiting for you to discover, now!

Hurry…it’s almost February already…time to focus!

WOW…it’s already almost February and how productive have you been in achieving  your goals? If you are like most people, the power to focus is something that is a real challenge!

So, how does a person stay away from procrastination and fear based doubt? Mastering one simple saying is all that it takes for you to have the next 11 months be the best ever. Here it is…

Where your focus goes, Your energy Flows, and Whether it is positive or negative, that is what Expands and grows.

Sound to simple or good to be true? It isn’t. Most people fail to realize that it is the small, seemingly inconsequential actions that actually ensure success. Most people quote that it took Edison over 1,000 times to create the light bulb. However, what allowed him to persevere throughout those many attempts?

I find it interesting to note that no one talks about how he would have had to laboriously set up, perform and record every attempt to prevent duplication? What was the filing system he used? How did he stay organized? How did he make sure that nothing was ever duplicated? How was he able to perform each experiment one by one, focused and intentional.

If you want to master any task to create amazing results, fighting through frustration and distraction is key. Keeping your focus and energy going into a single minded endeavor, keeping a positive outlook and repeating as needed until completion is what Mastery is all about.

Edison had in his lab the following quote by Sir Joshua Reynolds, “There is no expedient to which a man will not resort to avoid the real labor of thinking.” Distraction, immediate gratification and lack of focus destroy success and achievement.

Just for fun, how many times have you strayed from this article, if you have read this far? Building intense focus and single minded purpose is a learnable skill. Review your goals. Take a single, simple action everyday to move towards completing them. Rewrite your goals in the evening. Write out your action plan for the next day. Measure, monitor and reinforce every attempt to succeed. Feed yourself positive thoughts, focus on your goals 24/7, feed them, and act on them again and again and again. Take small simple steps everyday. Your future starts now, today.

To your continued success,

James

If you having challenges with focus and procrastination, sign up now for 30-Dyas for Success. Master the Simple Solution to focus and achieve today. www.30DaysforSuccess.com

Focus in 3-Steps: Executive Coaching John Wooden Style

In a previous post, I talked about the acronym F.O.C.U.S.S. and how a person can create greater levels of purpose, self-confidence, and direction. Today, I’m going to approach the concept of “focus” from the perspective of one of the greatest coaches in basketball history, John Wooden.

“In 1948, I began coaching basketball at UCLA. Each hour of practice we worked very hard. Each day we worked very hard. Each week we worked very hard. Each season we worked very hard. For fourteen years we worked very hard and didn’t win a national championship. However, a national championship was won in the fifteenth year. Another in the sixteenth. And eight more in the following ten years.” ~JW

My question is this, “Did the teams develop to a point where they could finally win a national championship or did Coach Wooden develop himself into a national championship coach?”

 

First Step: Be clear who you are and what Skill you choose to pursue excellence in (internal focus).

If you are going to become a master at a skill or craft, make sure it is one that you love and will emotionally support you for the next 20 years. Then, work to be the best!

To support this assertion another quote, “I am not what I ought to be, not what I want to be, not what I am going to be, but thankful that I am not what I used to be.” ~JW   Focus on being your best now in this moment, every moment!

“For an athlete to function properly, he must be intent. There has to be a definite purpose and goal if you are to progress. If you are not intent about what you are doing, you aren’t able to resist the temptation to do something else that might be more fun at the moment.” ~JW

 

Second Step: You must set goals that align with the expression of who you want to become and the skill you are choosing to master.

Set BIG, HUGE GOALS (external)!

For example, I chose a skill set of running many years ago. After thousands of miles of mastery, there was room for growth to always set the bar higher in terms of external goals: a 10K, half marathon, marathon, Goofy Challenge, 50-Miler, 100K Ultra and the pinnacle…100-Mile Ultra. Those goals took 20+ years of focus. As I took yoga along the way to keep flexible and train, I didn’t set a goal to become a yoga guru.

Big Goals provide the impetus to learn to perfect yourself in the execution of becoming more. They create the pressure to become meticulous because every detail counts. A hot spot on your foot in a 10K or half marathon is not big deal, on a marathon it becomes a little more important but during an ultra-marathon it means the difference between success and epic failure. Large goals are critical because they provide motivation to be diligent, prudent, and sustain a heightened level of awareness; internal and external. That creates focus.

“Adversity is the state in which man most easily becomes acquainted with himself, being especially free of admirers then.” ~JW

 

Third Step: Large goals create large obstacles to overcome.

This scares other people away from you so you have more time and energy to focus on your pursuits and not be presented with their problems.

How often during the day are we interrupted, distracted and presented with other people’s problems and life issues? People tend to conspire with others who will give them solace, empathy, and commiserate with them on their problems. The more a person commiserates with another, the more they keep coming back for more commiseration! If a heavy set person starts telling you how bad they feel, most people think it is OK to say, “I’m sorry, you know, it’s not really your fault. After all its genetics, thyroid issues, etc.” What happens when they get that response?  They keep coming back!

Granted it’s not polite to say to them, “then get off your fat buns and do something about it.” BUT, if you are setting a high goal of health for yourself, that person will naturally shy away from you. They know intuitively, as they see you pack your bag for a lunchtime workout, they won’t get much sympathy. You scare them away by setting higher standards.

 

BIG Goals scare people away because they suffer internally by comparison.

This cuts down in interruptions, distractions, and people telling you their problems. FOCUS comes from setting a higher standard than your peers. An added benefit is that the only people who will interrupt you are the people who have high standards and the exchanges will be more in the form of support, encouragement and sharing of tips that help you refine and master your craft. These can be good because they actually boost your energy, efficiency and the time spent for the interruption is time saved with what is learned by sharing.

Welcome the adversity and feelings of “being alone” in your singular pursuit. This creates focus. Here’s a supportive quote.

“When everyone is thinking the same, no one is thinking.” ~JW

 

Let’s recap these three steps:

1. Be clear on who you are and what skill you want to master (internal mindset)

2. Set Goals in that skillset that are HUGE, stretch yourself as high and far as you can go!

3. Get comfortable with scaring other people away and being alone…set a higher standard. Your only interruptions will be from others with high goals. Those interruptions will be fewer but very supportive!

 “The road to real achievement is usually bumpy and long, but you do not give up. You may have setbacks. You may have to start over. You may have to change your methods. You may have to go around, or over, or under. You may have to back up and get another start. But you do not quit. You stay the course.” ~JW

To your continued success,

James, Executive Business Coach

Learn more about Coach John Wooden here:  www.coachwooden.com

One Minute Business Coaching Solution

Here is the One Minute Business Solution:

1. Take out a pen and paper

2. Write, RIGHT NOW, as FAST AS YOU CAN, the answer to this question:

“What do you believe about your business?”   WRITE—RIGHT NOW!!!!!!

At least one page…if you are reading this…STOP AND DO IT!

WHEW…now that you are back…I have a follow-up question:

How much of what you wrote, was about Possibility and Moving Towards Your Goals of Building and Creating? how much of what you wrote was about Necessity and Moving Away From what You Don’t Want?

Letting go of the latter, those beliefs based in Necessity and Moving Away From is your One-Minute To Success Business Solution. WHY?

Necessity and Moving Away From beliefs open the door to a scarcity driven mentality. Lack breeds Lack and the reason I asked you to write it down right away, is because what drives your success in business is not what you consciously think about but what is just below the surface in your unconscious mind.

How often have you seen the sales person go in, make a great presentation and just not ask for the order and close the deal? On the surface they may say, “I rock! Things can’t be better!” but underneath is the Necessity and Moving Away From of, “I’m afraid of rejection, I don’t know exactly what to say, I’m afraid I’m being pushy, I might lose the sale, or I don’t like it when sales people ask me to make a buying decision.”

Fear, scarcity and lack are killers of any business. Keeping track of your beliefs about yourself and your business are keys for Success. And Letting go of the Negative beliefs are critical.

Wait, I forgot to let you know HOW you can let them go and what the One Minute Solution is! With the techniques of Hypnosis, NLP and Time Line Therapy, a person can easily and permanently identify and release limiting decisions and beliefs less than One Minute. If you are interested in more clients, more leads, more cash flow in your business, call now for your Executive Business Coaching “Success-Now” Session.  Clear up the head trash that is preventing you from achieving all you desire in your business and finances.  (919) 792-0085

To your continued success,

James M Murphy

 

How to Succeed: 4 Master Steps

In the science of Neuro Linguistic Programming, (NLP), one of the fundamental skills is modeling. NLP is the study of how to be excellent at something. If someone is getting excellent results then there has to be a pattern that can be replicated for someone else to be successful too.

In looking at diets for instance, whether you are South Beach, Atkins, Paleo, Weight Watchers or any other, the same pattern for getting results stands true. Basically, the body absorbs calories in the following order: simple sugars/carbohydrates (most processes things like high fructose corn syrup, sugar, pasta, etc.), next is complex carbohydrates that come from fruits and vegetables with higher fiber content, next is fats and last is proteins.

The common pattern in all of the diets is that you cut out the first source, simple sugars/carbohydrates, and most of the second. Then, your body is trained to use fat as energy. Hence, effective reconditioning of the body use fat as its primary energy resource.

What does this have to do with self-help, motivation and living the life of your dreams?

Every successful person has followed these basic 4 Steps to Success.  Most self help program covers many, or just one, of the following 4 Steps to Success.

1. Become Definite about your Mission, Purpose, or Path in Life.

2. Release any and all negative associations that aren’t in alignment with your Mission or Purpose.

3. Create a Master Plan to build and create something that provides an emotional experience for others that will help them to create/live their purpose. Build it!

4. Make sure the Tithe, give generously to complete the circuit of energy.

Follow these four steps and success will be knocking on your door sooner rather than later.

TO your continued success,

James

If you are stuck finding your Purpose, Clearing Negative emotions, creating a Master Plan or finding a worthwhile means for tithing, call for your “Success-Now” Session.

(919) 792-0085 

Happiness Project App Announcement

HAPPINESS! Could you use a little more of it in your world?

In an article by Rob Silverblatt, “The Science of Workplace Happiness,” April 14, 2010, “a recent study…indicated that just 45 percent of American workers are “satisfied” with their jobs” and “the lackluster economy has put a damper on upward and even lateral movement, leaving many workers feeling trapped in their current positions.”

WOW, that means that an estimated 55% of the American workplace just aren’t happy. In addition, the one key step that is needed for happiness, “the ability to be purposeful, grow, and achieve” is missing in the workplace today.

What is a person to do?

Well, there is a solution and it doesn’t entail quitting your job. Take a look at this new app that I have the pleasure of being a part of. It specifically addresses the Happiness Factor.

The “I Am Happy Project” is launching a mobile app called the “Happy Button” to help users improve their health, relationships, work and life by boosting their happiness. The app is free and will be available for download on October 1 at www.iamhappyproject.org and on Apple iTunes.

The Happy Button App has several functions to help users boost happiness:

  • A daily inspirational message to boost their happiness level.
  • Video messages about happiness from experienced life and business coaches.
  • Audio messages about happiness from experienced life and business coaches.
  • Blog posts about achieving happiness written by life and career coaches.
  • A simple question to measure where you fall on the happiness scale for the day.
  • Your average daily, weekly and monthly happiness measure.

I decided to be part of this project because after working with people for over 14 years, it amazed me how people value achievement, learning, growth, and prosperity but many times forget to add Happiness to the list. When I was contacted by Edwin about the Happiness Project, it resonated with me personally. In today’s world, there is a huge undercurrent of uncertainty and fear. Happiness is a lifeline for people struggling with career changes, financial stress and lack of a clear future. The purpose of this app is to help people work and live happily achieving with less stress, frustration, and anxiety, both at home and in the workplace.

 The app will be available for download through the Apple App Store and Google Play Store as of October 1 and later on Blackberry and Windows phones.  

About the I Am Happy Project: The I Am Happy Project is a non-profit organization with the mission of spreading happiness globally, one person at a time. In early 2009, Edwin Edebiri set out to shift people’s minds to happiness from the gloom and doom that dominates the news. The nonprofit is having an impact on our communities around the world, from Davis, California, to Chicago, Illinois, to orphanage homes in New Delhi, India and Benin City, Nigeria. I Am Happy Project groups are in 63 cities and 18 nations, representing every continent.

Join the Happiness Movement today and I look forward to hearing your feedback!

To your continued Happiness,

James

Need more happiness in your life? Call for a “Success-Now” Session and Change your happiness levels!  (919) 792-0085

Happiness: 3 Simple Steps

3 Secrets to Happiness

Do you remember that great book you once read? It seemed kind of long when you picked it up but as you read the first page there was anticipation, excitement, and desire to find out what was going to happen?

And like most books, it started slow as the characters developed. But, the plot thickened and it got more and more exciting and it started to go by faster and faster. Until finally, the ending was in sight and you couldn’t put it down, time stood still and you voraciously relished every last word to the very end.

Life is like a good book for the “Happy Person.”

There are three steps to achieve happiness.

1. A Happy Person has a long term vision, mission, or purpose for life that is achievable. In essence, they begin with the end in mind. Knowing what your purpose is and where you are going in life has many benefits.  First, it allows a person to relax and not get stressed because they “aren’t where they are supposed to be yet.” Mission and purpose allow positive emotional states like peace and relaxation to be present when a person focuses on their long term purpose. Second, in the face of obstacles, they have all the time in the world to find solutions because they have confidence, knowing they are on the right path and doing the right things.

2. While keeping their purpose in mind, A Happy Person chunks down their goals into small measureable actions that are easily attainable. At first, learning to tie your shoes is a laborious process. You have to bend down, get the laces, work through each single step to get the knot right. A happy person can focus on one small step at a time because they are very present in the moment. They are “Happily learning” each small step of the process because they know it is their mission and purpose to learn to tie their shoes. There is anticipation, curiosity, and excitement in discovering the joys of working towards their goals.

3. Chunking down goals into small attainable moments, a Happy Person can anchor in positive and inspiring thoughts, feelings and emotions to “living and learning.” Each and every moment becomes a joy. Just like at the end of the book. Momentum grows exponentially as happy people experience success in every moment of the day. Smiles and happiness are infectious and move the world.

BONUS STEP: More Happiness Now!

Go for a walk and ask yourself these questions 3-5 minutes a piece in this order. This exercise should take about 3-15 minutes. Let you mind answer the question each time before asking the question again.

1. When have I been Happy in the past? (3-5 min)

2. How do I know I am feeling Happy now? (3-5 min)

3. How am I going to continue to be Happy throughout the rest of the day? Tomorrow? Next week? Next Month?  (3-5 min…future pace out this question, ie  day, tomorrow, next week, month, etc)

When would NOW be a good time to continue to be Happy?

Your life is one great story. Write your own book of happiness, achievement and success. Happiness is contagious and so are smiles. Wear yours proudly!

To your continued Happiness, James

Anyone you know UNHAPPY with their life? Have them call to set up their “Success-Now” session at (919) 792-0085.

 

10 Reasons You Need an Executive Business and Life Coach

“Coaching” has been the buzzword in the business world for many years now. Just like “financial investor” or “consultant” used to be the latest and greatest, you can now add “coach” to the list. Whether a person has an instant positive or less than favorable reaction to the title, the fact is that hiring a professional, results driven “financial investor,” “consultant” or “Coach” will help you get everything you want in life faster and easier.

But, how do you know if you are ready or not to build that coaching relationship right now?

Here are 10 Key Indicators that you may be ready to hire a seasoned, motivated Executive Business and Life Coach.

1. Facebook, Twitter and social media pursuits take up the majority of your time and energy; along with an almost phobic need to check emails and “be connected” online. While business owners and executives may not be motivated to play online games like XBOX, social media can be an alternative that is just as dangerous. It can cause a serious lack of focus, the ability to effectively prioritize, drain the most precious asset of time and impede the development of strategic business relationships.

2. Panic and anxiety come crashing down upon you when you think of marketing your business. Every business needs a short and long term marketing strategy. Every SEO person will tell you that the best way to get on the first page of Google or any other search engine is consistently develop and publish your thoughts, ideas and create products. There is no “overnight” SEO Magic pill. Your businesses success depends on a solid short and long term strategic marketing plan.

3. Self help is your middle name. If your self help library contains more books, executive book summaries, podcasts and CD’s than you could ever read or listen to or if you have logged more seminar time than vacation time in the last year, you may be distracting yourself from really growing your business. Education is important but if it is excessive, there may be a real imbalance between education and effective action.

4. Following on the heels of self-help overload comes “buying overload.” Do you keep getting seduced by that next best thing or opportunity to grow your business? Do you spend a large portion of your income on “get rich quick” opportunities, hoping for that magic pill to fix everything? If you keep “buying into that next opportunity” before mastering the current one, that spells trouble and shows a lack of commitment and focus.

5. Working hard with no results. Results are great and the best results also include growth. Are you living comfortably in complacency? If excitement in your job has been replaced by stress from more and more demands to produce results, fear of being downsized or replaced by a younger “you” or feeling disconnected from the company you put your heart and soul into, an Executive Business Coach can get you results. And, if you are contemplating something BIG like a finding a new job or even a new career path…support is critical.

6. The question, “What’s wrong with me?” invades your mind throughout the day. Some of the greatest indicators you may need an Executive Business Coach can be found by being aware of your thoughts and the questions you ask yourself everyday. If you find yourself thinking that no matter what you do it will never be enough or you daydream of that secure 8-5 job that doesn’t carry any stress, those are the forerunners of depression, stress and low self esteem. Be careful and aware of your thoughts, feelings and emotional states.

7. You walk in the front door at home feeling angry and want to metaphorically, “kick the dog.” Are you feeling proud at the end of the day because you did all you needed to do to support your family? Do you have a loving relationship where you walk in happy, proud, and excited to be home? Or, are you moody, critical and grumpy because you just brought the stress of work home with you? Successful people are able to work hard when it work time and play hard when it is play time. They have work-life relationships that are balanced, harmonious and work well together. One does not suffer because of the other.

8. You feel trapped and alone. The higher an executive rises in a company or the longer an entrepreneur owns a company, the more isolated and alone they can feel. As responsibility increases, it is harder to take the problems and concerns to upper managament, they can’t be shared with people or employees below them and taking them home to the spouse only means disaster. The most unconditional form of support any business executive or entrepreneur can have is their coach. The ability to hear yourself talk things out is one of the greatest aspects of the coaching relationship.

9. There is a lack of mojo. Top entrepreneurs and business executives lead fearless lives. They are movers and shakers, drivers of business, creative stimuli that stay flexible, dynamic and are always on the move. If you have lost your energy, motivation and drive to be successful, you need some serious help. Being at the top means being at the top mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. Being able to move and motivate others is key for a successful entrepreneur and executive.

10. You are asking, “what is this all for, anyway?” Do you lack purpose? Are you truly fulfilled? Do you dream of early retirement so you can just quit? (Did I just really type that word?) Many people forgo their dreams of writing that book, starting a side business or just “doing what they want to instead of what they have too.” It is never too late to integrate dreams and goals instead of seperating them “until later.”

11. BONUS Indicator: You read this article. The simple fact you were led to this article and read it, means you may be ready for coaching. So many of my clients are drawn to the coaching process due to an “emptiness” or feeling of “wanting more.” They don’t know how to fill those needs or experience the peace, relaxation, or happiness they so desire.

How many of the above Indicators could you relate too? If you or anyone you know wants to experience “Success-Now,” call to set up a complimentary 1-hour session to explore how a motivated, seasoned Executive Business and Life Coach can dramatically help change your life. Not ready yet? That’s OK, sign up at www.evolutionforsuccess.com to receive weekly tips on motivation, healthy thinking and a better life.

How to manage time…1 Simple Solution

Over the weekend a friend asked how business was going and I heard myself say, “I need the world to stop for 4 months so I can get everything done I want to…and then have it re-engage.” I got to thinking about what I said later that evening and I realized if that was truly the case…I wasn’t managing time effectively at all. How does an entrepreneur/CEO/Executive manage time better? Here is one simple solution…

First, accept the fact that you can not manage time. It isn’t time that needs to be managed but your mental focus and actions. A persons mental focus will always be in one of three places at any given time. the past, present or future and each one has a definitive purpose.

Looking back to the past allows us to reflect on successes and failures (which are just opportunities to learn). Understanding the successes and failures of the past allows a person to take useful strategies forward and find new ways to use and apply them. It also allows us to identify negative actions and behaviors and reframe them into positive “learnings” so any negative emotions disappear and new possibilities for how a person “could choose” to do things differently in the future are uncovered.

Focusing on the Future is crucial because it allows a person to focus on one of the greatest human needs…becoming more. If we are not growing we are dying, it is a fundamental law of nature. The challenge is that some people focus on growing more that is positive and some people get into the trap of growing more of what they don’t want. A positive future opens the door to possiblities, growth, and “more” of life. The negative future, signalled by statements like “I don’t know or want…” only perpetuates negativity, scarcity and disempowering emotions.

And last place your focus can be is in the present, being immersed in the exact action, thought, belief and feeling right NOW…and NOW…and NOW…and NOW…and NOW. The present is the hardest to focus on because the mind is constantly pulled between the past and future.

THE SIMPLE SOLUTION…HERE IT IS!

Future—Past—Present

Focus on exactly what you want in the future…(not what you don’t want, but what you do)
Think about what tools, strategies and resources you need to be creative, industrious and solution oriented FROM THE PAST
Combine both into ACTION NOW in the PRESENT clear of any distractions.

Oh yeah, celebrate your success from doing something different today! When applied consistently, you will find yourself more motivated, inspired, fearless, and results will start to show!

If you find yourself lacking focus, a fearless attitude, or clear direction forward…call today for your “Success-Now!” Session. (919) 792-0085.

In the month of August, email me at james@evolutionforsuccess.com with the word 30-Day Challenge. I will send you a 30-Day Success Sheet and two complimentary 15-minute checkin’s, personally with me, as my way of saying thank you for your support over the years!

To your continued success,

James

How to create raving fans that refer you business!

Emerson once said, “What you do speaks so loudly that I can’t hear what you say!”

This is an incredible business insight. How many people work to promote their business by “speaking so loudly about their business” that people are turned off and never get to see what they can “do for the prospective client in their business.” There is a reason for the saying, “Actions speak louder than words.”

Business owners today will create a lot more success if they remember that prospective clients are watching what they do, often times more than anything they say. Businesses are constantly critiqued by the small courtesies that distinguish them from their competition.

  • For example, after a lunch and a business card exchange, do you immediately send the other person a invitations through social media to stay connected?
  • If someone really goes out of their way to help, do you send a “thank you” card?
  • What is your referral bonus? And if you have one…does it include a personal touch?

I know for me personally, I network a lot and everytime I meet someone new and they say, “Let’s do lunch sometime!” I immediately pull out the iPhone and say, “Great, let’s set up a time now!” If they don’t commit or respond with “Send me some times by email and we’ll connect,” I never follow up. When I pull out my phone, I am saying in that moment, “I value you and your time and I value me and my time, do you?” If they push it off on me to follow up with them, chances are, I will end up chasing them and that’s not who I want to do business with.

  • How do you answer your phone? How do you handle a cancellation when contractually, you are right but the customer wasn’t happy? Do you accommodate them or go by the “rules?”

You would be surprised why people are turned off by using a business or company. And while you can’t be everything to everyone; remember Emerson’s quote, “What you do speaks so loudly that I can’t hear what you say!”

To your continued success,

James
(919) 745-7569

PS-Comment below on what you have “done” in your business that spoke loudly with a client that you didn’t need to say anything.

Perseverance…the Key to Success!

“Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education alone will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.”
― Calvin Coolidge

Let’s talk for a moment about Persistence. If this is a behavioral trait that creates success, how is it defined? Webster’s defines persistence as, “the steady pursuit of what is undertaken.”

Let’s go one step deeper. What allows someone to be persistent? I like the term perseverence. Webster defines this as, “to continue from a determination of will not to give up.” Would you like to persevere a little more in achieving something more in life?

My 9-year old daugher came home from school at the end of last year with a brilliant homework assignment. She had been tasked to build an acronym for Perseverance. Here is the best way to persist or persevere in any endeavor:

P – Practice
E – Endurance
R – Respect to yourself
S – Set your mind on a goal
E – Encourage yourself
V – Venture with your luck
E – Even though impossible, go try
R – Retry and don’t let yourself give up
A – Ask questions
N – Never say “can’t”
C – Can’t give up
E – Everything will go well

Success in any endeavor is accomplished with perseverance. Those are some pretty great belief systems and things to keep in the front of your mind as you move forward towards your goals. They also help to cut down that most dreaded of all obstacles in the pursuit of our goals: FEAR. I love this quote from Winston Churchill.

“Sure I am this day we are masters of our fate, that the task which has been set before us is not above our strength; that its pangs and toils are not beyond our endurance. As long as we have faith in our own cause and an unconquerable will to win, victory will not be denied us.”
― Winston Churchill

In any endeavor you must put in the time and persevere until you achieve your goals. Even if the fear is there day in and day out. Persevere and you will always cross the finish line.

To your continued success,

James

“How Three Cigars Changed the Course of American History!” (…and the lesson can change yours!)

Managing all the life’s details is hard work. The key is to remember that sometimes the most important details are hidden withing things we might overlook at first glance. It’s important to stop from time to time; focus on what’s important and remember to look for what we might be missing. Here’s an example from the book, “The Greatest Stories Never Told” by Rick Beyer.

Confederate General Robert E Lee was looking for a decisive victory in the fall of 1862. If the South could score a powerful victory against the North, it may have been possible for them to gain the support of the European nations as an independent country.

General Lee boldly marched his troops North and invaded. As a result, he was pursued by a very cautious Northern General, George McClellan. Being very indecisive and lacking self confidence, McClellan tentatively searched throughout Maryland and agonized about what to do.

As luck would have it, three of McClellan’s men from an Indiana regiment camped overnight in an area previously occupied by General Lee’s troops. As the men were spreading out to bed down, one of them spotted a small envelope containing three cigars and one piece of paper. The men thought is was their lucky day because of the cigars but it was much more than that.

The paper just happened to be the the marching orders for Lee’s troops. One of Lee’s Asistant Adjutant General’s had obviously lost them on the field days before. As a result, McClellan got the confidence he needed and was motivated to move. He ended up winning one of the most bloody and decisive battles of the Civil War: the Battle of Antietam.

What are the small, yet extremely important tasks that may be hidden from your immediate view this week?

Is there something important you need to keep track of and have misplaced it?

What are the actions that must happen even at the inconvenience of others?

What do you need to ask for help to find?

Those three cigars and the critical information inside changed the course of history for the 5,000 men who died and the 20,000 who were wounded that bloody day.

Stay focused on the actions this week will change your life and don’t move on until you make sure they are completed and everything is in its right place.

In Business, “What are the KEY REVENUE GENERATING Activities that MUST be done?”

In Personal, “What are the KEY FINANCIAL, HEALTH, SPIRITUAL & RELATIONSHIP Activities that MUST be done?

Look past the envelopes and cigars to find your marching orders for the week. Keeping track of the small things in life, really does make a difference!

Amazing coaching specials are happening here at Evolution for Success in the month of July. Call TODAY and discover how you can get complimentary access to an entire online sales & marketing academy when you sign up for a 6 or 12-month contract.

Also, did you contemplate a Coaching Career? Or maybe, you just wanted to learn the skills and tools to integrate into your business practice. Whatever the case may be, stay tuned for details about an upcoming Coaching Certification in Fall 2013. You can, and will learn all of the best coaching tools that include the psychology of achievement and a proven sales/marketing curriculum.

Happiness Formula Revealed…

If you are looking for the magic formula for more “HAPPINESS,” look no further. Like all new ways of thinking and believing, they stick around longer when they are anchored into our neurology. Take this 31 day Happiness Challenge everyday in July and see how your life changes in the next month. Here are the steps:

1. Journal:
A. List three problems that you are thankful for (the reasons you are thankful must be to remind you something you know you are in the core of your being or what there is to learn from the problem, the learning of which will empower you with a new belief that will better you. Example, “I am thankful that I am scared to death of making these business cold calls this week because it will help be breakthrough my fear of being good enough, overcome caring so much about what other people think of me, and allow my business to go the next level by brining in clients and revenue so that I can take another vacation and help another person change their life)
B. Journal any other thoughts, ideas or concepts worth nothing and thank your unconscious mind for giving you those ideas and insights (regardless of if they are negative or positive)

2. Exercise: Put some form of physical movement in your day. A minimum of 20-minutes out in the sun for some vitamin D. Anything to get some additional oxygen to your mind and body, get your lymph system going and get those natural feel good drugs released (as my daughter says, “get those ‘indoor-friends’ moving” (endorphins)

3. Meditation: Meditation is proven to support a healthier immune system, relaxation and stress release. To get in the habit I suggest just meditating to your favorite song without words. Or, sit in your car before or after work for as little as just two minutes and clear your mind, practice turning off your brain.

4. Perform one meaningful, random act of kindness. It has to be meaningful which means it involves something that is emotional. An example, everytime I take my kids to McD’s, I ALWAYS put my change and a few dollars in the Ronald McDonald box because I know what they did for one of my clients who they supported when his son needed a brain operation. It immediately fills my heart with thankfulness and I think of the families in need who will have kids in similiar situations and all the good it will do for them.

Feelings need to be cultivated. They need to be cared for, watered, nurtured and supported so they can grow and produce fruit! Try this challenge for 31-days with me and see how it changes your life.

TO your continued success,

James

PS-Email me at James@evolutionforsuccess with the word “Happiness” in the subject line and I will gladly send you a daily “Happiness” form you can use for the month of July.

You have problems, compared to what…?

Bad Monday

Are you having a bad day? I thought I was one day last week. I was going to be late for an appointment and I was really frustrated since being late is one of my pet peeves. My frustration level grew as I turned off the highway and my forward progress came to a screeching halt. In front of me was an accident and a long line of backed up cars. As I took the detour in front of me, I snapped the picture you see in the post above. An interesting thing happened as I drove past this accident. Somehow, seeing the plight of this truck driver, putting myself in his shoes, and thinking about the phone call he was going to have to make to his boss put my problem (frustrated by being 10 minutes late) into perspective.

One of the greatest questions I ask clients when they are frustrated and angry at a problem in life is, “OK, its bad, but compared to what?” As human beings, it is easy to get wrapped up in OUR life, OUR problems, OUR perspectives, and OUR beliefs. To jumpstart the process of getting a person out of their OWN way so they can work to a solution, just ask, “Compared to what?” When we shift our attention to the plight of others, the challenges of others, the life circumstances of others (that we can relate too) it helps to put things into a different perspective. When you can shift your “referential index,” how you are referring to something, with a different perspective, it lessens the emotional impact so you can think more clear and see the opportunities to think or do something different.

It is not to be used as a justification for NOT doing something different but a means of getting unstuckk so you can find a new solution and take action to achieve a different outcome. Next time you are stuck and think something in your life really stinks…just state the problem and then ask yourself, “Ok, this stinks but compared to what?” So you thought you were having a bad day, compared to what?

In the end, my ten minutes late was nothing compared to the delays this driver faced, his boss faced, and their clients and their customers may have faced. It’s good to keep life in perspective.

If you are feeling stuck and frustrated with your job, career, relationships or finances…CALL today to schedule your Introductory Strategy Session to start moving forward again. (919) 792-0085

To your continued success,

James

Build Unstoppable Confidence: Lead the Troops

Develop Unstoppable self esteem & self confidence in your team!Self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-worth are one of the principles of “self-help” that are constantly spoken, written, and talked about. Let’s take a look at what people really mean when they say they need more of them. What do people really mean when they say, “I need to work on my self-confidence?”

When I hear client tell me they need more self-confidence and self-worth, what I hear them really expressing is that they need a little more self-competence. Confidence is about having the BELIEF, or assurance that something is the way that it is. The word confidence is normally followed by the word, “in…” Most people want more confidence in their own self or in knowing they can perform a task. Who would turn down feeling more confident? Being confident unlocks other empowering emotional states, like courage and boldness that are vital in the pursuit of a worthy goal.

Quick example, let’s say a client wants more self-confidence in speaking to women. In order to be self-confident and to speak to a woman, he has to have spoken to women in the past in such a way that he remembers his successes at it. No past successes equals no feelings of self-confidence. What he really needs to build and develop are the skills to become more competent in speaking to women. When he becomes more competent at speaking to women, naturally, his confidence level will rise. While self-confidence is the BELIEF in the ability to perform a task, competence is built through the PROCESS of taking the actions necessary, suitable or required to complete a task.

We all have the need to grow. Our bodies are muscle machines that are built to take on resistance. Every muscle, fiber and tendon in our body is meant to handle stress and strain. When we take on resistance, we naturally become stronger. We build more muscle, the more we experience resistance. The less resistance we take on, the more we experience atrophy. We become weaker and weaker. People who want more self-confidence are simply not competent at doing something they really want to do.

However, have you seen the person who succeeds and still appears to have a low self-confidence? How does that happen? While developing competence at a task, there is trial and error; sometimes things work and sometimes not. If our hero mentioned above gets the courage to speak to a women ten times, there may be only two attempts that produce a positive result. Building a healthy level of competence comes on focusing and celebrating on the two things out of ten that were done RIGHT. That goes against all human nature. If you got a 97% on a school test, would that be enough, or would you be inclined to search through everything you got right to find that one question you got wrong?

Competence is built by focusing on what you did that was the best, and learn/forget the rest. Most people would never acknowledge the 97% of what was right on the test in their pursuit of finding what they missed. You’ll notice a pattern that all people with low self-confidence can always tell you what they have done incorrect, wrong, or poorly.

Self-confidence is the result of being Competent in a specific task or achievement. Competence is built by accepting challenges in the pursuit of a worthy goal; a person has to be willing to push through resistance to become stronger. As new actions are taken, staying focused on celebrating what is done right, (not wrong), will lay the foundation for competence and ultimately an unshakeable feeling of confidence.

To lead more effectively today:

  • Identify specific areas where a person wants to be more self-confident
  • Support them to develop a strategy to become more competent
  • Focus on catching people “doing things right” (they’re probably focusing on what’s wrong)
  • Celebrate competent actions, (they will be uncomfortable doing this, so push through)

 

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