Do You Hate Hallmark Holidays? Unleash New Passion on Valentine’s Day!

Up the passion in your relationshipsIs it time to shake things up in your love life and create more passion, fun, and  intimacy?  Relationships can’t be sustained on past memories or with the same gifts year after year.  So step outside of the ‘Hallmark-Have-tos” and do something different this year!    

Tony Robbins® likes to say, “Your life is a direct reflection of the quality of questions you ask yourself every moment of the day.”  As an Executive Business Coach, one of the foundations of my practice is asking powerful, engaging questions.  So here are 3 simple questions that will unlock new passion in your relationship on Valentine’s Day this year.

Before Valentine’s Day, ask your partner these 3 questions and look for his or her response to each question.  Which one elicits a more emotional response? (Note: these are NLP-neuro linguistic programming based questions; use emotion!)

In order to know you are totally loved, is it necessary for you:

  1. To be taken places and bought things, or to be looked at in a certain way? 
  2. OR is it necessary for you to hear certain words or a certain tone of voice?
  3. OR is it necessary for you to be touched a certain way, held, or have some type of physical contact? 

Everyone has a preferred love strategy.  And the way to get your partner more motivated this Valentine’s Day is to make sure you love her in her way, not yours.  Relationships grow and real love happens when you give to your partner in their own “love language”. 

Based on your partner’s response, here are some simple tips:

LOOK:  If he or she responds more to being bought gifts, taken places, or being looked at in a certain way, focus your energy on going out to dinner, buying that special gift or presenting her with a bouquet of flowers.  Give him or her a visual representation of your love, whether it’s in the way you look at her all glammed up at dinner or in a physical reminder of how much she means to you.  

HEAR:  If on the other hand, your partner seems to care much more about your words, reach for your pen!  Your love note will hit its mark.  But don’t stop there.  Make a concerted effort to reach out throughout the day on that day and share your feelings. 

TOUCH:  If your partner is more of a touchy-feely person, you might want to skip the greeting card and reach for the massage oil!  In any case, make a point to connect with him or her in a physical way at some point in the day.  Snuggle first thing before waking up, hold her hand on the way to dinner, don’t keep your distance… Find a way to help her feel what she means to you.

Relationship Coaching to improve the passion in your relatiionshipsFor more ideas on loving your partner in their own Love Language, check out my other post on the 5 Love Languages

Stop the Hallmark insanity. Invest in your relationship and create your own passion this Valentine’s Day!  

…And guys, here is a coaching tip for you!  If “Talk” is her top Love Language, link a new habit with an existing habit.  Pick up a few extra cards, put them in your glove box and when you take your car for an oil check, they will be a reminder for you to create an impromptu Valentine’s Day for her. She deserves to be appreciated more than once a year!  

Tips For a Better Relationship… It is never too late to address an issue with your spouse

One of the cornerstones of a great relationship is communication and one of the hardest times to communicate is when there is an issue that is emotionally charged. In those moments, chances are that whoever is more of the introverted personality type will close up and not speak while the other person expresses everything that is on their mind.

For the more extroverted person, once they express their emotional state they are done and complete but for the introvert, if they don’t speak up, it stays inside and is not resolved.

It is important for introverts in a relationship to remember to address and express their emotions and feelings to their mate even when it is after the moment.

Otherwise, it can lead to resentment, built up stress and anger, and unresolved feelings. Over time, this is destructive to any relationship.

To your continued relationship success,

James

Tips For a Better Relationship… It’s About How Your Partner Feels, Not Just What You Do

To you guys out there,

When it comes to the women we love, when they are in their feminine energy, they feel and experience life from one emotion to another without much logic. (for you women reading, this is how it should be because we need your passion and emotional energy, it feeds us).

That is why this next quote is something that we as men should always remember.

Kindly words do not enter so deeply into women as a reputation (consistent acts) for kindness.

At the end of the day, she will never remember how many problems you have solved for her, how many solutions you have come up with for her problems, or how many things you have done or fixed for her…BUT, she will always remember how you made her feel emotionally! Are you making your woman feel loved and cherished unconditionally? Do you revel in her energy and emotion? (whether it is positive or negative?) Revel in it all. Make her FEEL special and you will be special to her!

To your continued love and success,

James

Relationship Special: Rekindle The Passion With Your Wife!

Are you dreading going home at the end of the day?

Are you scared of how your wife may react to your choices and decisions?

Are you stressed, finding it easier to go to work than be at home?

Are you looking at other women and feeling tempted?

Is your wife nagging you constantly?

Or worse, has she stopped nagging you?

If you want to rekindle the fire of that first date with your wife, reignite the passion of your first kiss, and experience a passionate, loving relationship again then Personal Coaching with Evolution for Success is for you.

No matter what challenges you are facing in your relationship today, the “Secrets of Success” are the same…

#1: Get clear. As specifically as possible, decide what you want. The clearer you are on what you want to have in your life, the more likely you are to achieve it.

#2: Get perspective. Most people don’t tell anyone what they want or what they are struggling with and because of that they don’t get an outside perspective.

#3: Get support. Very few people (if any) achieve anything great alone. Sports stars have teammates and coaches. Be willing to ask the people in your life to support you.

#4: Create Change. All learning, change and behavior happens and the unconscious level. Before you can take the new actions to create what you want, A person needs to let go of obstacles and create new patterns of thinking in order to be able to create new, successful behaviors and actions that lead to their results.

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** Special ZERO COST “Secret of Success” Relationship Coaching Session for Men **

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Do you have something SPECIAL, something important for you to change? If you want to speed up your success rate, then I’d like to help you do it with a Special 1-on-1 “Secret of Success” Relationship Coaching Session where we’ll work together to…

=>Create a crystal clear vision for ultimate success so you know exactly what you want, where you’re headed, and what you need to do to make it happen.

=> Uncover hidden challenges that may be slowing down your progress or not allowing you to create the changes you need in the long run

=>Leave your session renewed, re-energized, and inspired to finally achieve the change you seek. If you’d like to take advantage of this very special, very limited, and totally FREE 30 minute “Secret of Success” Coaching Session, follow these easy steps.

 

#1 Call and reserve your FREE 30 minute “Secret of Success” Coaching Session, now, at (919) 745-7569.

#2 You will receive an email confirmation that will ask you to provide answers to some questions. Answer the questions and return them prior to your “Secret of Success” Relationship Coaching Session.

#3 Call for your session and be prepared to create all of the change you desire in your life, now.

In your email, answer the following questions…

1. What do you most want to change today?
2. Have you tried to change this before?
3. What have you attempted in the past that didn’t work?
4. Why do you think it didn’t work?
5. On a scale of 0-10, how important is it for you to achieve change today?
6. What other areas of your life do you want to change (if any)?
7. Full Name
8. Email Address
9. Phone #
10. Time Zone
11. How you received our email: person/online post/internet

Since we’re making this offer for the first time right now and we don’t know how intense the response will be, we can’t guarantee a coaching session for everyone. We’ll schedule as many people as we can and then start a waiting list. You can expect to get contacted by our team to schedule your session within the next 3 business days. If you don’t hear from us, it means we’ve received more requests than we can handle right now and if something opens up we’ll get in touch with you at a later time. Again, to take advantage of this offer, simply click reply and answer the questions listed above.

To Your Continued Success,

James

PS: The sooner you call, confirm a session time, and send us your answers; the more likely you are to rekindle that passion with your wife.  Call Now! (919) 745-7569

What Are Your Actions Showing Your Partner

“All work is an act of philosophy.” -Ayn Rand

What you pursue with your career, social life, finances, relationships today is an act of your underlying philosophy of that area of life. If you are engaged in your relationships, that is an act (or action) that reflects your underlying philosophy (thoughts and beliefs) about what relationships mean to you.

What you do in your career, is a direct reflection of your underlying philosophies. What are the underlying philosophies of those in the military who serve our country? What are the underlying philosophies of those who are employed by the government? What are the underlying philosophies of the entrepreneur?

What does your line of business tell you about your underlying philosophies? Are you a financial broker? Are you a doctor? Are you a teacher? Are you a coach? Are you a non-profit volunteer? What does your career/industry/occupatoin tell about your underlying life philosophy?

What are the underlying philosophies of your life today…not in what you want them to be, think they are, or tell yourself they are…BUT WHAT YOU ARE SHOWING THEM TO BE WITH YOUR ACTIONS? Those are the real philosophies of your life.

Tips For a Better Relationship… Laugh a little

So there was a fish swimming along in life one day and suddenly he hit a wall…He yelped, “Dam.”

One of the greatest skills for a happy life is finding the humor and irony in the situations we find ourselves in. It is easier to take life in stride when we find a way to laugh and smile at the things we encounter. Keeping life in perspective and finding humor makes life a lot more enjoyable and the people around you end up laughing too.

This is expecially true in a relationship. Since opposites attract, what you find in your spouses behavior that is so wonderful initially, after time, you may realize that it makes you whole because it is exactly where you have your weakest spots. If you are an introvert, the spouse is an extrovert…what you love about the expressions and energy of life, can in time, highlight where you weakest in an area of life. Keeping a healthy respect for how your mate makes you whole with the thier strengths while you understand they are your weaknesses…AND BEING ABLE TO LAUGH AT YOURSELF or the SITUATION and not take it personal, will keep your marriage fresh and energetic! It will also allow you to focus on how the person makes you whole and complete instead of how they are not more like you.

So, next time you find yourself in a situation that could be challenging, remember to smile, see the irony of the situation, and be sure to laugh out loud for the irony of the situation! Repsect the differences and don’t take things too seriously!

How do you build a great relationship?

How was the Great Wall of China built? One brick at a time.

Do you have something that is a HUGE goal? Something that is exciting, marvelous, and larger than your life right now? How are you going to get there? One Action at a time. It is really overused but honestly, all that we have is today; right here, right now. If there is something that you want to build, create, and have in your life, lay one brick down today and make it be laid to perfection.

Do it the absolute best you can. Tomorrow, there will be time to worry about the next one, and the next one, and the next one. Today, do your best to lay that one brick and see what can be built over the course of time.

Who knows, people may be inspired all over the world for your accomplishments and I bet the first thing they will ask is, “How did you do that?” We know the secret…one brick at a time.

Relationship Coaching

I love the movie Band of Brothers and think of it often in terms of the psychology that is shared by the type of entrepreneurial spirit we have in this country. For the person who is willing to go out and make a difference, you have to be strong, confident and focused on a vision, mission, and purpose. In order to be successful, that mission, vision and purpose supports the individual and their life goals and it also goes a step further and encompasses those in their inner circle who the care about the most, it carries out further to those that he knows as everyday contacts, and even further to those in the world who have yet to hear their story and be inspired by it. In the end, it is not about the self, but truly about serving others. Because there is another treasure buried even deeper in that process. When you serve other selflessly, you lift them up on your shoulders and help them to understand the secret inside of them, help them become more than who they think they are, and that makes the world a better place for us all.

So when these few people learn this secret of life, we find greatness in them. They bring out the betterment of ourselves which in turn helps us to bring out the best in others. The Servant Leaders will risk their mission, vision and purpose by putting it out there for all, and in the end, regardless of all of the hardships, will live it and be willing to die for it! It is shown in a quote by one of my favorite war heroes from The Band of Brothers, Easy Company, US Army Infantry, WWII.

Richard D. Winters: [real life interview with Winters where he quotes Mike Ranney on how Ranney answered a question his grandson once asked him] I treasure my remark to my grandson who asked, “Grandpa, were you a hero in the war?” Grandpa said, “No… but I served in a company of heroes”.

I serve in a company of heroes!

When it comes to a relationship…are you bringing out the best in your mate? Are you bringing out the best in your children? Are you setting an example for them that they would be proud to follow? Make the answer to those questions, “YES!”

Tips For a Better Relationship… Live With Honor

For you men out there…here is what a woman will find attractive!

Are you living with honor as you try for a quick pick-up? Are you living with honor when you go into hiding because she is in a heightened emotional state? Are you living with honor when you look in the mirror everyday?

A great relationship starts with a honorable relationship with yourself. A woman will always look for certainty in a man and your core values and living honorably will go a long way to attracting the woman of your dreams!

Achievement without personal honor is of no value!

Everyone wants to achieve greatness in life to some level. However, when we achieve something that is not congruent with what we know is true to ourselves, our family, our community, the world…there is little honor in it. Living life with a guilt free conscience, doing what you know to be true and honorable according to your principles is paramount for true achievement and success.

All the best…live with Honor!

Tips For a Better Relationship…Stay On Your Purpose

As man in a relationship it is easy to forget that You are the Master of your Fate and the Commander of Your Soul.

It is so critical for the man to be on his purpose in life first in order to be strong, confident and lead effectively. It is on your shoulders to constantly remember and see what it good in your mate, to make the tough decisions, to stand in her need for constant certainty and be questioned on all you do. That needs to be balanced with not working to please her contstantly, or expect her to be more motherly towards you, or expecting her to be more like you by approaching things with logic and reason versus emotionalism.

You, as the man, in the relationship always lead by example, make her your number one woman but not your number one priority in life. Treat her with love and emotional support and always see what is good in her and affirm how she is enough and what she gives is enough. See and embrace her beauty and emotionalism! It is oxygen to a man on his purpose in life! Don’t be scared of her femininity…suck it in for it is life!

Have a great week commanding your ship through the seas to reach your next port! May it be exciting, fulfilling and adventurous. To remember that every day at sea is a good day can remind us to see every day as good too!